A defense mechanism that involves taking our own unacceptable qualities or feelings and ascribing them to other people.
The emotions and ideas that the mind keeps in the unconscious, via dynamic repression, that concentrates upon a child’s desire to have sexual relations with the parent of the opposite sex (i.e. males attracted to their mothers, and females attracted to their fathers).
Father’s Day is always a difficult time for me each year. For the past 7 years in particular, I’ve been dealing with my dad’s physical absence from my life and only just recently managed to gather up the courage to reach out to him again. Part of my reason stems from life being too short and the possibility of restarting some sort of relationship with my dad. After writing him a deeply confessional letter, it was comforting to see him returning it with a text message and understanding. I’ve harboured a lot of resentment towards him over the years as I’ve often assumed that he doesn’t care about me and hence we cut each other out of our lives. But part of me does believe that he still loves me even if he doesn’t show it in the ways I’m hoping for.
Our most recent conversation involved a revelation: The fact that he’ll be moving up to Queensland in a matter of months and he wants me to attend his wedding. It’s a difficult position to put me in considering that I’ve spent most of my life with a proper father figure in my life and instead an endless void. So as you can see Father’s Day in not an occasion where I feel like celebrating and unfortunately I’m constantly bombarded with reminders at work and all the shops I visit leading up to it. Not even my step-father of sorts measures up to be an adequate dad as I’ve never really felt that close to him and he’s also spent a lot of time criticising my life choices behind my back. He means well but alas my mum is the only close parent I have in my life.
Regrettably, I spent a lot of this week projecting negative feelings and emotions at my mum after coming down with a nagging case of the flu. I’ve been coughing and sneezing like crazy, an endless phlegm and mucous factory, disposing of hundreds of tissues. I felt really bad about getting angry at my mum when I was actually angry at my immune system for not acting fast enough. Sadly there’s never a convenient time to be sick and when you’re forced to do group activities at uni, it’s the worst people time. Somehow I managed to get through my workshop, tutorial and two labs despite almost losing my voice and lacking motivation. I was also determined to get myself better in time for tonight’s gig as obviously I didn’t want to infect my friends 😛
Tonight was a really special time for the Sentinel boys, playing one of their biggest shows so far. At the venue, I hungout with my usual array of friends including the Glorified boys, Sabian, Sarah, Louise, Courtney, Bridget, Callum and Katie. I also had a really in depth conversation with Chris Millward tonight. He is seriously a top bloke, buying me a beer, being fucking hilarious and holding so much talent for writing. He’s simply a really good friend and I’m grateful to have him in my life. We spoke of the local music scene being a community of sorts, of which we are all constantly contributing. We all have our roles to play and it’s such an honour how large an impact it’s had on my life.
SENTINEL…Hands down one of the tightest performances I’ve ever seen. I honestly couldn’t be prouder of these boys. They more than deserved this opportunity to support Protest The Hero. The stage presence from the band was top of the tree with Jamie shaking his paintbrush hair and Dale doing some back up screams. Vocalist Brandon was really in his element tonight, showing so much confidence to a really decent turnout for an opening band. Chris Millward from Glorified dropped some guest vocals during The History Weave and also killed it. Really stunning set overall!
RECLAIM THE FIRE…This power metal band was originally called Empire but they recently changed it to Reclaim The Fire. A really high energy performance from the start with loads of head banging from the dread-locked guitarists and the crowd alike. Vocalist Ed was really fired up on stage, delivering an intense growl. The metal heads in the crowd eventually started forming a mosh pit and getting stuck into it.
PROTEST THE HERO…Right from the start, this Canadian-based progressive rock band was delivering infectious guitar riffs with plenty of rhythmic groove and a powerhouse vocal performance from Rody. In between songs, Rody was cracking jokes ranging from Australian vs. Canadian accents to pot shots at Madonna, making the whole show thoroughly entertaining and very praiseworthy. They really packed a punch musically and the now full venue was super charged with their songs. There were plenty of dynamic shifts and abrupt changes in direction throughout but this kept it interesting. One thing is for sure, after tonight I can say with certainty that Canadian bands rock! 🙂